Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Monday Mailbag!

Since I published my book last week, the emails have been rolling in. Or, in the name of all things grammar, I feel it is my duty to say, the email has been rolling in. It’s coming fast and furious. I can hardly keep up with it. I’m sorry that I can’t get to you all; I’m trying but I’m just one man. And believe me, when you get the instant fame like I have, it’s hard to deal with right away. Since I can’t get to all the email, much to my shame and dismay, I’m gonna pick an email and random to answer. And let me tell you, I’ve been getting some crazy questions from crazy places. So, let me reach my virtual hand into my cyberhat, and here we are…question number one from the first ever David is Super Famous Monday Mailbag

Who do you think you are?
-Sophie Burlington, VT

Excellent question, Sophie in Vermont. I love Vermont in the fall. There’s nothing like a early-late-mid-evening walk in the crisp autumn air. Unwinding after a long day while winding through a veritable forest of, well, trees. It sounds lovely. I’ve never been, but that’s how I imagine it would be.

But I digress. Who do I think I am? Who do I think I am? Who do I think I am? I could go on and on. I mean, there are still four words that haven’t been emphasized, but what would that prove? Well, I mean, of course, other than the fact that English is just a smorgasbord of possibilities.

Anyways, a wise man, I think it was a kid in my elementary school. A bully really. He said to me, “Hey, jerk,” He was punching me in the face while he spoke. “Hey, I think therefore I am!” And then he kicked me while I was down. And that’s always stuck with me. I think therefore I am. Let that be a lesson to you, Sophie.

Until next time, this is your Monday Mailbag.


  1. You mean someone actually took the time to find your email address, and to write to you "who do you think you are?". That is pretty funny. And sad. Sophie sounds like a real jerk.

  2. Price of fame, my friend. Price of fame.